So I get it – there’s really no point in spending too much time writing messages or even talking on the phone to a new OC match… it all comes down to “chemistry”, which can only be felt (or not felt) while interacting with one another in person. So it becomes a simple task then just to casually meet up with one of these matches for a quick date and some easy conversation. Surely when testing for the existence of “chemistry” one need not go to great lengths to schedule an event. Forget about ambience. Just pick a place and a time and walk up to this person and say ‘hi’ and get to talking. Sound easy enough? Sure does…
But what happens when the test results come in? And they certainly will be negative – you can count on that. How will you both react? Suddenly an easy situation has become a gut-wrenching exercise in disposing of someone (who is obviously lonely to begin with). Not fun. It’s no surprise that this approach to a first date fails miserably. It’s engineered to fail. By taking every possible romantic factor out of a date, the date ceases to be. Rather, it becomes a screening interview for a job neither candidate is qualified for. And the conversation proceeds similarly…
Unfortunately I agreed to meet my last OC match according to this approach (it was her preference). Now, of course I knew it was a bad idea. But here’s where this story gets interesting.
"I can’t think of anything to say next" Next time before the first date jot down a list of conversation topics (e.g., follow-up on the previous communications), in case of emergencies like this. Just a thought. …
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