It’s best to save those topics for the later communication stages.

I look for what gaps there are in the profile about the “basics” and personality traits that are important to me. It’s enough to stop and make them think but not really difficult. I rarely change them between matches.

I don’t see how anyone can rule someone out based on just those questions. My guesses, if they did, would be that they are fairly inflexible or didn’t fill out the personality profile accurately.

I’ll throw out my five and how I arrived at them:
I’m active, so I like to know how often they exercise, as that’s a good indicator of level of activity. You would think that would screen some folks out but almost everyone responds that they exercise with some frequency.

I’m a bit of a go-getter, so I ask if they are ambitious.

I ask if about how they are financially (okay, maybe this is pretty bland and possibly a turn-off) as saving for a rainy day is a pet-peeve of mine but you don’t get much feedback with the canned answer choices.

I ask if they are trusting (hmm, maybe it’s a bit creepy to ask someone this one) but I think that provides a great insight into their personality.

Finally, I ask if they are dominant in their personal life.

(If anyone reading this thinks I’ve committed a big no-no in using one of these or wants to discuss further, by all means, please let me know)

Generally, these, coupled with their profile helps to give me a better picture of who they are. I would say that I either rule them out right away when I read their profile or they are a “maybe” and I need to get a better picture by getting to OC.

Just avoid asking the same topic more than once, e.g., two romance questions, two exercise questions, and so forth.

Let me know if you want to know which questions I use.