Kinds of men in Christian dating sites

Shell of Nashville, Tennessee offers a taxonomy of men she met in Christian online dating sites:

1. The truly odd. This includes the guy who proposed marriage in the first e-mail and wanted me to move with him to take care of his family in Kenya (Flattering, but no thanks.), to the fella who told me he was heavily involved in church work because he rang the buzzer to signal when Sunday School ended

2. The everything-at-oncers. These are the ones whose initial e-mail is, in itself, a novella. They try to cram all the information about themselves that they possibly can into the first message so they can get to know you quickly. They basically send you their Manifesto on life. A little intimidating all at once.

3. The non-responders. The ones who seem nice, have a nice profile, and send you an e-mail. You respond once and then … never hear from them again. Was it something I wrote? hmmm…

4. The separated-but-still-marrieds. You’d think on a Christian site you wouldn’t really get these but you do. You exchange a few e-mails and then one time they slip in the little, “I should probably tell you this; I feel like I need to be completely honest with you … I’m not yet quite divorced.” To me, that’s like being a little pregnant. You are or you aren’t. And if you are, you aren’t for me.

5. The need-money-now’ers. I had one ask me if I was a trust-fund baby. ??? Sheesh, even if I was, would I tell you, a total stranger?

6. The I-never-read-your-profile-but-liked-your-picture. I’m always amazed at the guys who obviously never read anything about my profile. They turn out to be either extremely liberal in their church views – like they put down that they don’t attend at all, really, to the one’s who are so fundamentally legalistic they shock even me. And I consider myself to be fairly conservative.

7. The i-can’t-be-bothered-with-punctuation-guys. i find nuthin attracktive abot riting lik this, do u? I was an English major. Call me picky, but I just can’t have e-mail conversations where I have to fight a continual urge to edit, edit, edit….

And finally, the one’s (whom I can count on one hand), where I have exchanged many e-mails, phone calls, text messages, etc., but it just didn’t work out for some reason or another. They keep life interesting, for sure.