eHarmony Blog.com

eHarmony Blog is on your side. If you have a complaint with eHarmony and you have trouble getting through customer service, let us know. If so, Do not forget to give your eHarmony account email address and do not forget to give us permission to chase eHarmony on your behalf.

Here is last month’s supply of consumer complaints against eHarmony posted on the leading gripe website ConsumerAffairs.com, plus our comments. Some of this month’s complaints are valid and justified, thus highlighted, while the rest are “buyer beware — read the fine print” or may be resolved with a call to customer service.

No, we are not eHarmony, we just like to help out or comment. If you have an opinion as well, post them at the end of the article.

Our website logs show that eHarmony staff read the September issue of “EHB, on your side” at least eight times last month.

#1 Anna of Lindon, UT September 28, 2010

I was conned into a “free” weekend. I did all the testing and then offered a reduced rate for a three month package.

I attempted to use the site and get acquainted with other users. Again, there is not browsing or all profiles. you are only doled out five a day, and found that those did not match my standards of religion, non-drinking, non smoking code of ethics. I was sent all social drinkers or moderates, Catholics, Psbyterians. Etc.

I also was insulted when I went to try to match and told I needed to pay more money after I signed up to get the “personality” tests. I was livid. I complained and then was no longer introduced to any quality matches. Just some 3000 miles away. What a farce! This company is bogus and portrays the success of their matching games. I do not agree. They refuse to give refunds an expect a client to pay regardless of their doing their part or making any consultations for their lack of integrity.

I canceled my credit card after two months, notified them and they could no longer charge my card for nothing in return. Then after I cancel they hurried and sent me more messages that there was someone in Wyoming wanting to contact me. I did not for their ploy.

I wrote the following letter to them to complain. I do not trust these sites. Their matching is not helpful. It was the biggest waste of money with their lack of finding anyone who was even near what I am about. Here is the complaint I send in response to their attempt to lure me back. NO WAY!

“Just unsubscribe me please. I found the eharmony method of online “dating” to be very unhelpful.

Evidently, according to your analysis process–I take an active role in taking care of others and have NO life. What an insult!

I am a service oriented person, and the scanning process does not take into consideration there people actually give a “care” about others and have qualities that are enhanced as they give acts of service in a genuine way. I guess the system is inhumane and cannot fathom that NOR match me up with someone like myself in the two plus months I was a subscriber.

Please delete me from your system, since there was NO way for me to do it myself. I find that very manipulative and controlling on eharmony’s part.

Sincerest regrets that this site did not measure up to my standards of living a chaste, virtuous life and a non-drinking lifestyle.”

I signed my name and sent to as a reply.

Anna, we’re sorry the service didn’t work for you. Did you set your Match Settings to stop receiving smokers, social drinkers, Catholics and Presbyterians? However, naturally, if you narrowed your settings, the fewer people they can send to you.

Paying customers need to call customer service if the service is for any reason not working or is not satisfactory.

#2 Marie of Roseburg, OR September 27, 2010

Offered FREE service, after lengthy questions required payment to “view” matches – none of which were actually matches. No response from those who “might” be matches.

I do not believe anyof them ever received any notice from eHarmony. Such a SCAM and I have requested CANCELLATION of my subscription.

Marie, eHarmony cannot force anyone to reply to you, the same way they cannot force you to reply to the men who are interested in you. However, unless there are technical difficulties, all of them receive notices.

#3 Renee of New Port Richey, FL September 22, 2010

WOW! What a wake up call. I have used E-Harmony in the past with no luck. However they had a good promotion going so I thought I would try again. Wrong…I spoke to 2 people and 1 supervisor and for some mysterious reason my credit/debit card was declined.I immediately called my bank and was assured there were no holds put on my card and ther was more then enough money in my account. I called back again since the promotion was only good until the end of the day. Again the said my bank declined payment

.This time I spoke to a supervisor at the band and she faxed me paperwork showing me where E-harmony was actually blocking my card from being processed. Guess they did not want me as a customer. They gave me some cheesy excuse on how they were unable to locate why my card was not being accepted. I used my card for grocerys and no problem.

Thanks e_harmony for saving me the money I spent it on something much wiser. Maybe you should change your name to E-Disharmony

Right, thank them that you didn’t give them any money.

#4 Lisa of Juneau, AK September 19, 2010

At the beginning of the really long questionnaire, one of the first questions they asked was your status – they had a box for every time of relationship INCLUDING married or separated. Since I am separated, but not legally divorced, I marked separated. I answered a ton of questions and at the end they said they couldn’t help me because the site was for singles only.

Yes they have to fix that and end that cursed questionnaire as soon as the registrant tells them that she is still married.

#5 MaryAnn of Woodbridge, VA September 16, 2010

I joined E harmony for a year for 240.00 in September 2009. I was sure in a few months I would meet someone. I did, two people, none of which what my profile asked for. There appears to be no way to get in contact with E Harmony to let them know of my concerns. I am so feed up with this site I just don’t know what to do. I can’t believe in the MD, VA and DC area they was not one guy out there that I matched.

You were sure, MaryAnn, but realistically, nothing is guaranteed.

Their phone numbers are here. Yes, they try their very best not to show it on their website.

#6 nora of leonardo, NJ September 15, 2010

i joined eharomny.com today. all i get is men from other states. 2 were from jersey. i feel im not getting my moneys worth. if im doing something wrong that im not getting jersey men . let me know.

Yes, Nora, you can change your Match Settings.

#7 Therese of Waterford, MI September 12, 2010

I also signed up during the free communication promotion, but after completing a lengthy profile, had to give credit card info just to view a match/profile. I never received any 2-weeks credit.

I’m sorry, Therese, where did they say that they will give you a 2-week credit? Where?

#8 kim of scottsdale, AZ September 10, 2010

- I had to join for 3 months and my last month has been: 75% matches without photos and most of them shorter than me. I’m a 5’10″ female, do you think I’m looking for a 5’7″ man? _ Why do they not advertise contact info. directly to the compnay?

Kim, do you remember that when you registered, you can “skip” submitting photos? If you didn’t, you still received matches. Therefore profiles without photos are sent to members as matches.

#9 nancy of garfield, OH September 10, 2010

WEll, long ago in 2008 I signed up PAID. That has since lapsed. This past weekend over Labor Day 2010 they had a “free” communication weekend, so I looked just to see what might happen. 1st off, I had ZERO new matches, what a surprise. Looking at the 8 old ones, from 2008, I decided not to write to them, as they may well have met and married someone by (2 yrs?)now, perhaps married and divorced them. Heck they could’ve DIED by now.

Lo and behold, since Tuesday (the day the free promo ended) I have received a grand total of 8 (funny how they all did this) letters from my old matches (yes I remember their names and cities) all 8 of whom magically “saw” me and are now interested and are “requesting communication”. This of course requires a PAID sign-up to do.

I will bet BOTH of my boobs (no risk bet) that those people have NO IDEA that eHarmony is sending out these communication requests. and I will further bet the same commodity that eHarmony sent the men the same letter stating that I requested communication with them after 2 1/2 years. Take what you like from this, but if you ever want to meet an actual person and have an actual DATE, try Okcupid or plentyoffish. Just bring your asbestos shorts, ladies, they all think we are all desperate. REALLY.

#10 ray of encinitas, CA September 10, 2010

mormoral weekend 2010 e harm was free,i neened a new password every day 2 get in,lots of e mails out of my age request,all my requests were were ignored,all matches were mostly noncompatable,2 acess e harm with ypur own email is not possible directly like other sites,u mustlog in each & every time,very time consuming.this is the 3rd dating rip off site in a row that ive tryed,they didnt get my money this time.

Be thankful, Ray, that you didn’t give them any money. By the way, you may need to work on your written communication skills such as spelling and grammar.

#11 Penny of Marlboro, NY September 10, 2010

I was given a match named “Aramis”, which he admittedly said later on was not his real name! His name is Gaspar P., a physician in the Highland Mills area. He must of signed the e-harmony required policy that states all users must give honest and true information.

So, Penny, Dr. Gaspare Polizzi of Highland Mills, NY wanted some privacy. He needed to use a pseudonym, so he must be a psycho. Fine. But, in any case, tell me why your complaint is directed towards eHarmony?

#12 Rod of Gaffney, SC September 7, 2010

I was offered a free trial this past weekend, so I filled out their massive questionaire, which was very time consuming. When it came down to the range that I was willing to explore(30 miles?, 100 miles?, etc.), I put the option, “anywhere in the world”! I received an e-mail later, that stated that they had no matches for me! No matches anywhere in the entire world! Come on! I’m not that bad am I? Imagine how that made me feel! I went to the internet and was somewhat relieved to find other people unhappy with this company. Apparently this is just a scam. Probably having to do with my low income at the moment. They probably figured that I couldn’t afford to be scammed by them!

Rod, so “you fuckin spent three fuckin hours to fuckin answer their fuckin questionnaire and not one fuckin girl is fuckin compatible with you. WTF?”

Well, Rod, you probably received your first set of matches a few hours or a day after. They need to fix their wording and say that they search for new matches daily. We already told them this suggestion last October.

#13 Armand of Taunton , MA September 6, 2010

Their web site and their emails are in a perpetual loop. Impossible to use them. There is no way to call them, because they do not list a phone number. Their tech support is impossible to activate. A lot of aggravation and waste of money.

Sorry this happened, Armand. Their phone numbers are here. Yes, they do everything to hide it.

#14 Betty of Wheeling, WV September 3, 2010

I joined e-harmony for 3 months and they were sending a lot of matches but none of them were really a match. I joined again for a year and they stopped sending matches, I may get one here and there, usually without a picture and I need a face to go with a communication. I was very disappointed with their marketing tactics and requested they send my money back but they refused. It took me a while to find their address, contacting them is not an easy task. Now they are asking me to join for another year, are they kidding!

No, Betty, they’re not kidding. Just close your account(do all the steps if necessary) and you’ll never hear from them again.

#15 Debora of Sacramento, CA September 2, 2010

Once again…I was dupped. Back in 2008, I decided to give Eharmony a try. Bad idea. The “men” I met were always miles and miles away or really bad matches. After a month, I gave up. Well, much to my surprise, when I attempted to “try for free” last week, I discovered I had to pay first. So… in my ignorance, I went ahead and forked out my 59.95 only to discover that Eharmony had been loading on “matches” for the past 2 1/2 years. can you believe this!?

After nearly a week and a half of asking them to PLEASE delete these useless matches whom I am SURE have gone on with their lives and probably wonder why I never ever contacted them (because I was not even active at the time), I finally get an email (I emailed and emailed at least four times) stating that I have to do it myself, manually, one by one. Forget this. I called my bank just now to request “fraud.” Can you believe it? The bank representative actually asked me if I wanted their phone number? What is the chance that a Wells Fargo bank rep is going to have a EHarmony phone number handy to call?

Seems to me Eharmony must get an awful lot of fraud complaints for them to be so liberally willing to hand out their number–one in which frantic members can’t even seem to obtain themselves for the life of them!! I said “no thank you.” I was done dealing with Eharmony and just wanted my money back. I will say that their book is excellent and saved me from a potential lethal relationship.I highly recommend it.

When I had a recent “Boyfriend” read it, he stopped when he got to the chapter on “good character” and refused to go on. Seemed he had a bad one and high-tailed it out of the relationship so I will give the authors credit for that, but as for this website, I think it is [bad]and a ripoff at that. Shame on them for such lousy service, and in this economy as well.

Congratulations, Debra, for getting your money back. I don’t know what happened, but you didn’t have to pay to see that eHarmony had been sending you matches in the last two and a half years.

You’re right that customer service should have a button on their end to close multiple matches if the paying customer requests it. If I heard that “manually, one by one”, I’d also would have been furious. They should fix this.