eHarmony Blog.com

After its dismal attempt at entering the Marriage Counseling field, eHarmony is now venturing into the Profile Writing cottage industry. (I wonder what is going on with their China project. They stopped talking about it in June last year.)

By now, considering its product offerings, you might be wondering what eHarmony thinks its typical customer is like. Is she so unaware of herself (Premium Personality Profile), goes to great lengths to assure she is real (RelyID) and afraid to give out her phone number (Secure Call)? What does eHarmony now think of its customers this time?

But why profile writing? Here’s an explanation. According to our run of a poll they ran across their members last April, the top two reasons why members don’t pay up is first, price, and second, “I haven’t been matched with anyone that interests me.” So, they offer an additional expense to make their members’ profiles more interesting — hey I didn’t say it was a LOGICAL explanation.

The banners first appeared last Wednesday, September 9.

A professional writer will take the time needed to bring out the real you! (… but isn’t this what the questionnaire and the Personality Profile were already supposed to do?)

They also provided a sample.

(How can they not be aware that you CAN’T have paragraphing in About Me answers?)

Update: More info from the official blog

Did you know that eHarmony users who have more complete “About Me” profiles receive up to 35% more communication? If you’d like a little help with this important part of the process, try our new feature, the eHarmony Profile Advisor ™. With this new service, one of our professional writers will work with you to help you express yourself in a fun and genuine way. Here’s how it works:

Shortly after you purchase the service, one of our eHarmony Profile Advisor writers will contact you via email to follow up. If you have sections of the “About Me” profile you left blank, they’ll ask you to write something down since they don’t just make up things about you. But more often, they ask you deeper questions concerning any of the answers you may have already written down in your profile. For instance, if you simply said “I’m passionate about skiing”, our writers will look to understand why you really love it. Is skiing something you’ve done all your life? Are you on a ski team? What is your favorite ski resort? Is it your favorite way to unplug? They have an uncanny way of describing interesting tidbits about you so that your matches really understand what makes you special.

Our writers are fast and can typically take just a few days to turn your profile into something that really makes you stand out. Once we’re done, you have two days to look it over to make sure you’re happy with it. After all, we didn’t do our job right if you don’t feel like your profile represents you well. If you don’t like what we’ve written, we’ll work with you until you’re satisfied. That’s our commitment to making sure your experience with this product and our site surpasses your expectations. official blog, dated 29 September 2009

A better idea — a profile writer directory

1. Without doubt, there are people who need help in writing a dating profile. There is a market for this.

2. But it doesn’t take long during a Free Communication Weekend for anyone to realize that the profile is a tiny first step. Awesome profiles are useless unless the subsequent messages are of the same tone or style.

3. The eHarmony process is very different from other dating sites, so a profile writing service made especially for eHarmony is a great thing, IF IT WORKS and the service gives the imperative follow-through.

4. The company had no recent job postings for writers, so the persons who will perform the service are likely freelancers and stringers. This product would have been much better launched as a directory of profile writers, together with ratings, testimonials and samples. eHarmony then gets a commission. Look at WritersNet. Furthermore, the profile writer can set their price; reputable ones can charge far more than $100.

No directory of this kind exists on the Net.

5. There is a three-day refund policy, and they “will seek to … reasonably satisfy every customer after the refund period through extended consultant interaction, editing and/or writing by multiple consultants, etc.”

6. Before you buy this, note that the product’s terms and conditions is not a Work for Hire agreement. This means that the copyright owner of the work is either eHarmony or its contractor, depending on THEIR arrangements, not yours. Whoever owns the copyright can reuse, derive or do whatever they want with it.

Cheaper Alternatives

• Have a member of the opposite sex look at your photos and profile. Get a third opinion, too.
• Our “One Month in eHarmony?” tipsheet tells the three primary things a profile must answer.
• Read eHarmony Cracked
• Post your profile for critique here or in the eHarmony Cracked Mailing List
• EHB’s completely unauthorized strategy to success.

* The eHarmony Marriage product is still available, but it gets as much marketing push and media exposure as their Compatible Partners site — in short, nada.

P.S. Below is the entire Advisor terms and conditions of sale. I reprint it here because it isn’t in a public URL:

The following terms and conditions govern your use of the premium service called eHarmony Profile Advisor™ (the “Service”). These terms and conditions are in addition to the general terms and conditions and privacy policy governing your use of the eHarmony relationship services. By using the Service, you are consenting to be bound by these terms and conditions, as they may be modified from time to time as described below.

1. Use of Information. Due to the nature of the Service, eHarmony must rely on information provided by users in connection to their profiles. You agree to provide us with any information we may require in order to offer you the Service. You hereby grant eHarmony a nonexclusive, royalty-free, perpetual, irrevocable, and fully sublicensable right to edit, use, reproduce, modify, adapt, publish, translate, create derivative works from, distribute, and display such content solely in connection with your profile on eHarmony’s website(s).

2. Service Restrictions. You agree that eHarmony may modify, update, suspend, discontinue, or restrict the use of or your access to the Service, at any time and without notice or liability. Further, we reserve the right not to provide the Service to you if we reasonably believe that doing so may expose us to liability, in which case we will refund to you the amounts paid to us for the Service. Once your updated profile that is the final result of the Services is posted, the Service will be deemed fully rendered. The foregoing includes if you post any part of such updated profile to your account before the Service has been finalized. Further, any photo critique features that may be offered as part of the Service will be limited to critique and comments on the submitted photos, and no editing or other modifications will be rendered.

3. Subcontractors. By providing eHarmony any information using the Service, you agree that eHarmony may disclose such information to its subcontractor(s) or third party vendor(s) that eHarmony may use to provide the Service to you. As used herein, “eHarmony” will be deemed to include any such subcontractors or third party vendors.

4. E-Mail Delivery. All items purchased in connection with the Service are sent through e-mail. You may not use a false e-mail address or otherwise impersonate any person or entity. We will make every effort to deliver your order to you on time to your e-mail address, but we cannot be responsible for technical difficulties related to the checking of your personal e-mail account. We will seek to send your order to another e-mail account specified by you if you encounter e-mail difficulties.

5. Refunds. We incur costs to provide you the Service even if the results of the Service later become unsatisfactory to you. Therefore, you agree that we will not refund the fee for the Service after 3 days from your date of purchase, regardless of the reason you may ask for a refund. We will seek to, at our discretion, reasonably satisfy every customer after the refund period through extended consultant interaction, editing and/or writing by multiple consultants, etc.

6. Representations. You represent and warrant that (i) you own or otherwise control all of the rights to the content that you write and supply to us; (ii) that the content is truthful and accurate; and (iii) that use of the content you supply does not violate this agreement or any third party’s intellectual property or other proprietary rights. You further represent that the content you supply to us will not be unlawful, threatening, abusive, defamatory, invasive of privacy or publicity rights, vulgar, obscene, profane or otherwise objectionable, which encourages conduct that would constitute a criminal offense, give rise to civil liability or otherwise violate any law, or which contains advertising or any solicitation with respect to products or services. You will indemnify eHarmony for all claims resulting from content you supply in connection with the Service.

7. No Implied Warranties. YOU AGREE THAT WE MAKE NO WARRANTIES, REPRESENTATIONS, OR GUARANTEES, WHETHER EXPRESS OR IMPLIED, ABOUT THE SERVICE. FOR EXAMPLE, WE MAKE NO WARRANTIES, REPRESENTATIONS, OR GUARANTEES THAT THE SERVICE IS ACCURATE, COMPLETE, OR CURRENT OR THAT IT WILL OPERATE WITHOUT INTERRUPTION OR ERROR OR THAT IT IS MERCHANTABLE, FIT FOR A PARTICULAR PURPOSE, OR SUITABLE FOR YOU. THE SERVICE IS PROVIDED ON AN “AS IS” AND “AS AVAILABLE BASIS” BY US. BY USING THE SERVICE OR BY RELYING ON ANY OF THE INFORMATION PROVIDED AS A RESULT OF YOUR USE OF THE SERVICE, YOU ASSUME ALL THE RISK AND RESPONSIBILITY ARISING OUT OF SUCH USE OR RELIANCE.

8. Damage Limitations and Indemnification. EHARMONY SHALL NOT BE LIABLE TO YOU OR ANYONE ELSE FOR ANY LOSS OR DAMAGES WHATSOEVER, INCLUDING BUT NOT LIMITED TO ANY INDIRECT, SPECIAL, CONSEQUENTIAL, INCIDENTAL, PUNITIVE, OR OTHER DAMAGES, ARISING OUT OF THE USE OF OR INABILITY TO USE THE SERVICE, EVEN IF WE WERE ADVISED OF THE POSSIBILITY THEREOF. IN NO EVENT WILL WE BE LIABLE TO YOU FOR ANY AMOUNTS IN EXCESS OF YOUR PAYMENT TO US FOR THE SERVICE. You will defend, indemnify and hold us and our officers, directors, representatives, agents and affiliates harmless from any and all losses, damages, rights, claims and actions of any kind arising from or related to your breach of your obligations under this Agreement and as a result of your gross negligence or intentional misconduct.

9. General Provisions. Our failure to act with respect to a breach by you or others does not waive its right to act with respect to subsequent or similar breaches. These Terms and Conditions, in addition to the general terms and conditions and privacy policy governing this website set forth the entire understanding and agreement of the parties as to the subject matter hereof and supersede all prior proposals, discussions or agreements with respect thereto.

10. You agree that you have read and understood all of these terms.