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“What are you looking for in a relationship partner?”

I ask you to forgive the match who sends you this canned 2nd question, for she did not read your profile. If she did, then at least this person will type you a question asking you to explain further. All this proves is that she clicked the checkbox and hit send.

Personally I hate people of this sort. Yet I’m open-minded enough to give them a redeeming chance. My answer is:

Please read my About Me page.

(I refer to the question: What is the most important quality that you are looking for in another person?)

I will not spend 2 seconds typing a reply when all this match spent is 2 seconds click-sending me this redundant question. You may be different. If you want, use the verb “see” instead of “read” so it is less sarcastic.

What do you think of this question? Is it common coming from your matches?

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    Comments 6

    1. Maria wrote:

      Oh, I so agree with this perspective! When I saw this question, I was like “huh”? (What’s that supposed to mean?! seems to be a common thought for me on eHarmony…)

      1. Obviously, if you are using eHarmony you are looking for a long-term relationship/marriage, as that’s what their advertising is all about.
      2. If you’ve listed you want kids, then obviously a partner who wants a family…or not, if you didn’t. T
      3. The “most important quality in a partner” sort of describes the rest.

      For someone you haven’t even met yet, I would think that this is a enough information to help assess if you’d want to meet them or not. I think politely referring them back to your About Me page is a great answer.

      Posted 18 Jul 2009 at 11:26 am
    2. Karen wrote:

      I disagree.
      The “About Me” questions provide a very limited number of characters to respond. The “2nd set of questions” provide a lot more space to answer, and elaborate.
      This is a question that I use regularly. I think your “Please see my about me page” is kind of rude, and I’d seriously consider closing out a match who responded with that.

      Posted 26 Dec 2009 at 2:31 pm
    3. Scottk wrote:

      I agree with Karen 100%.

      I use this question often.

      Your “About Me” might only brush upon what you are looking for in a relationship partner.

      As Karen says, the space in “About Me” is limited, and very likely, most of it contains many OTHER thing besides what you are looking for in a relationship partner.

      I am looking for “more” than that.

      Thus, I ask this question.

      I can’t say I have ever Closed anyone at that Stage, but seriously OP, if I were to get that kind of crap answers back, I do believe that would warrant a Close right there.

      Posted 26 Dec 2009 at 8:44 pm
    4. Smith Daniels wrote:

      If you are getting desperate and need a Partner then Read my story about how I went from loser, to getting the girlfriend of my dreams.

      Posted 20 Jan 2011 at 4:31 am
    5. Guest wrote:

      I agree with the op. I can never find a polite way to answer this without being rude or saying the same thing over again! I’ve already written what I have to say about it on my profile, and really don’t have anything to add or elaborate on at this stage in the game, unless he asks me specific questions! (which would require, and this is asking a lot, him to read my profile!! :-)

      Posted 06 Mar 2011 at 11:22 am
    6. relationship wrote:

      Passion in what one believes and in putting it in writing is a true talent.
      This particular article has the perfect combination of passion and excellent
      material wrapped up into an easy to comprehend article.

      Posted 28 Mar 2011 at 7:22 am

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