eHarmony Blog.comeHarmony emailed the following poll question (copied verbatim) to some of its registrants early this month. Let’s find out what the wider audience thinks. Pick one or more of the choices.
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EHB, on your side — October 2010 issue 1 minute, 15 seconds agoHi! This poll is missing many reasons:
* the touted 238-a-day success rate is, frankly, beneath pathetic.
* the communication process is tedious, long and completely douses any initial attraction one feels.
* the About Me format blocks adding creativity and uniqueness when writing one’s profile.
BG:
I think most of us on here would agree with you on criticizing the success rate and from many angles. The service is what it is. I guess the rest of us who aren’t generic enough and are further right on the curve to just find any ‘ole someone and end up hitched only have the choice of scoffing at it in frustration.
I sometimes wish that there was an express communication with guided process (so that my answers are already in there and essentially, once we communicate, I accept their MHCS by default and they see the answers to my 2nd questions, well, since I’ve already answered just about all of them in my answer bank and the answers rarely change for the individual match). FastTrack was supposed to be that sort of thing but it seems to be not used often because of a number of reasons and well, folks apparently in the online dating world are overwhelmed with choices and need reasons to rule folks out, just like they would in real life, I guess. It is a balance of not wanting to meet folks versus too many and it’s a hard one for some to manage (I have a tough time closing matches that do communicate that aren’t really good, mostly because it feels so rare to actually get any to communication).
It is up to you to write unique stuff in your profile and not come up with the same generic stuff.
The counterpoint is that Match.com has absolutely no definition for the free-response portion of the profile and you would be surprised just how many profiles I read on there that read almost exactly the same. IF that doesn’t make you want to run away and stop dating and just be single forever, I don’t know what will. Ditto for folks not filling out all the fields.
I guess I am just getting jaded about online dating the longer I’ve stuck with it and have not been to thrilled with the results.
I now am seriously wondering if I am missing out on trying to meet women in bars because it seems like maybe the normal women are out there (instead of online, like the media keeps telling us), even though it is the last place I see myself doing so. Maybe the perspective is that in general, it is just not easy to find someone.
Welcome to eHarmony Blog, BG. We have gone through your frustrations too and one of the reasons why we made this site is to let members share information, encouragement and advice and overcome the service’s limitations. (I like to think the web community is now more informed given that eHB compiled all this info and given our placement in search engine results.)
It’s true that touted success rates mean zilch when we’re not experiencing success. However remember that this site is here and there’s no excuse to hack these frustrations alone.
E
Among 125 voters, the biggest objection why they haven’t paid for the service is the price, and objections to the quality of the service is no more than 22%.
Conclusion:
1. eHarmony is a good buy, albeit a bit expensive.
2. With sufficient discount, eHarmony is a great buy.
One month in, I’ve found that my matches have been abysmal.
More than half of the matches seem to be inactive and many more don’t fit the settings I’ve decided upon (including age – I’ve set 28-37 and routinely get 25-39 – and location, more than the 100km away that I’ve set).
I didn’t mind paying the money, it’s really not that expensive when you get a discount (3months for 30$) and it’s comparable to what you pay for a night out.
KB:
Inactive or uninterested seems to be the trend across the various services.
As for age, you might want to narrow the range as much as it currently allows (6 years) and set it to be “very important” although keep in mind, the narrower the range you set, the less matches you are going to get. The algorithm generally tries to abide by what you set but I find it tends to go a year or so older no matter what (or may tend to follow the range that they recommend for you when you set the age range).
The eHB going rate of $10 month via the discount codes isn’t too much. Their standard rate of $60 for one month that they love to quote? That’s insanity unless you are willing to take “anyone” and settle on the one or two that you _might_ get to open communication with in that time period.
I’m a lesbian, and really, really hesitant to join a web site that admits it hasn’t done any research on GLBT folks while promoting its extensive research as its biggest selling point. I have straight friends who’ve had great success with eHarmony, but Compatible Partners doesn’t have the same track record (yet), and it’s just as expensive. I didn’t happen to join during the “free” period, and now I can’t find good discounts. The perceived value just isn’t there.
LOVE the eHarmonyblog, though. I am really getting a lot of my questions answered here.
unable to set firm limits that are used and enforced – such as age and distance location
@john, I removed your comment to bzzzzgrrrl according to our ‘no heckling’ comment policy. bzzzzgrrrl posted a civil, legitimate comment and your response is set to provoke and insult.
You may be interested to know I removed some of Susie’s comments as well.
it was bad spinach stew.
@John indeed. Your harassment is adorable. Mwah.
@eharmonyblog Thanks. I appreciate it, and I am sure others do, too.
For clarity, since I realize there was a grain of misunderstanding to the deleted remark: I am on Compatible Partners, which is eHarmony’s GL (not BT) site.
I don’t even remember what I wrote.
But, in light of my recent recovery – I apologize bzzzzgrrrl.
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